'Trivial' Logic

"If a then b" statements are trivially true since a never happened. So, this provides the basis of illogical logical deductions.

You have to come up with a conditional statement which will never happen followed by something ridiculous. Here is an example:

If pigs could fly, people would sunbathe during heavy rain.

Hate is such a weak emotion

If non-living things become living things, leg hair and sneeze mist are always found in volcanos.