"Happy Birthday!! aww you remembered? of course! Lol jk facebook told meh."

"Im ridin solo! Jk my moms drivin"

"Hi can i help u? No i waited in line for 15minutes just to say hi."

"Hey wat time is it? Time for you to get a watch:3 Time for you to get a better joke."

"THE WALK OF SHAME when u throw a paper at the garbage can and misses."

"Umm can I have a coke? "is pepsi ok? i dont know is monopoly money ok?"

"Whens the baby due?......Im not pregnant..."oh"

"I check behind thw shower curtains for murderers when I go into the bathroom"

"When my bowling ball is rolling, I try to use the force to direct it!"

"I hate when one string of my hoodie becomes longer than the other."

"Waving at the security cameras when you enter the store."

"Alot of dumb stuff is going to happen when pigs learn to fly!" XD

"DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!! dude we have to try this.."

"I was amazed when i saw ipod! is the same upsidedown!"

"Do you ride kangaroos in australia? No do you ride fat people in america?"

"I'd run for my life if theres a big fire at school. Not line up quietly."

"Dont let people push you around. unless its in a wagon or something, because that would be fun."

"BABY ON BOARD!. "oh well I WAS going to ram your car but now i guess not..."

"The moment of doubt when walking through a metal detector at the aiport."

"Cake."



lolz hah my fav is the last one:3 ok if you want more then someones has to make up a song bout eating an apple! :3