Hello, everyone. I'm here with some rather unusual news that you might be startled to hear/read.

I'm not here with news of any updates or anything like that. I'm not here to talk about any games or current events. No, what I'm here to tell you is that everything you know is a lie.

Everything around you is fake. It doesn't exist. You don't even exist. The truth is that we're all one entity. Each and every user is actually just one person: EpicArtifex.

We are all Arty. Each a different and unique part of him. The site is actually just part of his imagination. It's a way for him to fully express himself as deeply as he can.

That's not all though. Not only are we all actually Arty, but nothing Arty knows is real either.

Arty is actually just a cloud. He drifts through space with no purpose or direction. Long ago to keep himself entertained he dreamed up a world full of magic and wonder. He quickly got bored and dreamed up a smaller world with less wonder and no magic: the internet. DSi Paint was where he decided to settle down in his world.

Since then he's made up a person and a story for them each and every day, and those stories and people are all us, the users of DSi Paint.

The reason he's done so is that deep down he's lonely. And he needs a hug. If you see him around then I emplor you to stop and hug him tightly. Make him feel loved. Do it for him. Do it for you and everyone else here. Afterall, we're all the same person, and so when you help Arty you help yourself and everyone else.

But beware: once Arty is completely satisfied with himself, we'll disappear. He'll have no need for us anymore. But we will have made him a stronger person, and that's worth it.

So thank Arty too. Without his neediness we would not have come into existence at all. On behalf of all users who don't know you, Arty, I'd like to thank you personally. Thanks. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, just come to me. I'll be there. Because you and I are one. 