As you may be aware, millions of people worldwide suffer from the terminal illness, Chronic Slow Dying Syndrome.

CSDS spreads through any physical contact and is passed down from parent to child. The trademark symptom of CSDS is dying over the course of your entire life at a rate so slow you don't even notice it.

This causes problems over long periods of time such as dying and being dead, which are widely considered bad things.

The illness is far spread thoughout the world and has been a leading cause of death throughout history. In fact, nearly everyone ever has contracted the disease. If you're going to die eventually but don't feel yourself dying, you definitely have the disease.

Now, we all know dying is a terrible thing that can really dampen your day-to-day life, and %100 of all cases of CSDS have resulted in certain death, but fortunately there is now a solution.

With my invention, a very special box, CSDS is a thing of the past.

No longer will we live in constant fear of dying of this particular disease. We can rest well knowing we'll likely all die of something else such as any other terminal illness, heart attack, stroke, freak accidents, murder, minor illnesses which got out of hand, animal attacks, or a million other things which can pop up out of the blue(Down airplane?) and of which you have no power to prevent.

You can relax now knowing you'll instead die in a car accident or tripping down a flight of stairs. Maybe you'll die in some horribly painful way such as being caught in the aftermath of a nuclear explosion, having your flesh melt away, your insides bubbling up and oozing out of you in excruciating pain for days until you finally die.

With CSDS gone, a whole world of potential death is now open.

Just take my special box and place it over your head for 18 hrs every day for 3 months.

If you feel yourself running into walls and hitting things, that's just CSDS getting knocked out of you.

Order while supplies last.