Hello, all! Today, I am going to interview the one, the only, Mr. HullBreach! Rather than blabbing on about it, let's begin...

ME: Mr. Breach, from your profile, I see that you have been a member for a little while. How did you find this community?

HULLBREACH: I was looking my keyboard and found some letters, numbers, and symbols. After typing several of them into a text editor for a long time, everything magically appeared!

ME: That's fascinating! It seems almost everyone else used a search engine. Couldn't you have just done that?

HULLBREACH: I suppose that would have worked. I'll try it next time.

ME: You obviously like video games -

HULLBREACH: Are you accusing me of being a nerd?!

ME: What? Um, no,

HULLBREACH: Oh, so now you deny it! Nerds are awesome!

ME: Oooookay. Anyways, which video games do you like? It seems like Nintendo ones are your favorites, since you have at least a Wii, Nintendo DSi, and Nintendo 3DS.

HULLBREACH: I go blindly wherever Shigeru Miyamoto's characters lead me, but don't think that makes me a fanboy or anything. I've purchased other consoles in the past: SEGA Genesis, Sony Playstation, etc. I promptly rip out all gold and copper content, then drive to the scrap yard. Old game cartridges can have more than $1.00 in gold! "Gold! Gold!" says the crazy old bearded prospector.

ME: Were you dropped on your head as a child?

HULLBREACH: Uh-

ME: Don't answer that. Who is your favorite video game character?

HULLBREACH: That's a tough one. I'd say it's a toss-up between the Pong ball and Shaquille O'Neill.

ME: Um... I won't ask. Moving on, what is your favorite part of this community?

HULLBREACH: I like reading blogs on current events and those unpredictable sarcastic ones. Blogs that combine those are even better.

ME: Haha, I agree with you there! Waffle King has some blogs like that.

HULLBREACH: What's a "Waffle King"? I'm not hungry.

ME: Well, this has been an interesting interview - to say the least. Let's close with a simple question: Is it true that you really once ate a quart (liter for you metricized types) of pickles in 2 minutes flat?

HULLBREACH: Ah, yes, the good old days. I was at a talent show, and that was my entry. I consumed a full jar of Vlasic baby dills in exactly 2 minutes, as timed with a stop watch. The guys in the crowd chanted "Chug! Chug! Chug!" The girls were all in shock at the impressively classy consumption of bottled goodness. I tilted the jar to my mouth and drank all the juice, clearing all the contents by 2:38. After I left the stage to sit down, I felt a rumble in my belly that seemed to indicate I had passed my limits of pickle intake. A short burp later, I realized I was wrong. And that is the story of the only time I have been wrong in my whole life.

ME: Well, thank you for that interesting story.

HULLBREACH: Thank you for the opportunity. You are a gentleman and a scholar.

ME: As are you.