Sometimes I lay in bed at night and stare at the ceiling till my vision starts changing colors, making patterns and shifting in ways I cannot even begin to describe to you, dear reader. It's like a wonderful magic and maddening Hell swirling together.
Then I blink.
It's gone...

Memories for me are like that. I can hold onto them for so long but if I interrupt it I lose it. But eventually we all have to blink. Just the same as we have to think. Memories are lost in a sea of thoughts , only to resurface a long time from now, bloated and distorted beyond recognition, like the rotting corpse of a long since deceased seal.
It's a living hell, having memories lost for so long. It isn't like not remembering what you had for lunch yesterday. It's forgetting your own name, how to speak, how to write, how old you are, when your birthday is, what year it is, who the people around you are.

Try spending the day with your mate you've known for a good year now and closing your eyes for just a moment...
When you open them you're sitting in a strange house with a strange person sitting next to you and you don't remember how you got there or who this person is. They can see how distressed you are becoming and how terrified and confused you are and they don't know what to do other than hug you. I'm lucky that scents can remind me because when my mate hugs me his scent, the most amazingly sweet scent I've ever smelled that brings a feeling of comfort and love and passion, unlocks whatever door had decided to shut in my head and soon I calm down as it rushed back.

You get called a slob by your parents for how cluttered your bedroom is and the fact that your scent is all over the room and you can't stand it when that changes because sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night in a panic, terrified and confused, and the scent of your own room is the only thing to remind you of who you are and where you are because you made this memory stay through scent.

People tell you stories of things you've done and you can't remember it without a god damned scent to remind you. It's hell trying so hard to remember but you can't, it gives you headaches.

And sometimes I wonder... Isn't life just like that? Gone in a blink if we aren't careful to make our marks to remind ourselves and others of our presence. It feels like it's moving by so slow but eventually it moved faster and faster until soon enough you're laying on your deathbed staring up at the ceiling, staring through up to the stars in the sky, wondering to yourself, "Am I just a memory too, to be lost in the blink of an eye? To be lost among these stars that shine so much brighter than I?"

Then you close your eyes... But this time they don't open. Your floating in your sea of thoughts that twinkle in the dark, and all you can think is, "I'm lost in a sea of stars..."