Yesterday I made a very, very bad decision. Without going into personal details, I spent the night at the hospital with a dangerously high, fluctuating heartrate. I had done this to myself as a result of some personal issues, half-suicidal, half-praying that nothing would even happen. Since I was half-praying, my prayer was half-answered. I merely came close to cardiac arrest a few times instead of dying.

My mom was crying with sorrow and confusion when I told her what I had done that afternoon, as I have never before exhibited any sort of remotely suicidal behavior; even I was shocked at what I'd done. One thing is certain though: If I hadn't said anything to her, causing her to take me to Emergency, I would be dead. And now, even more than before, I don't want to be dead.

I want to live, if not for myself then for my family, and my girlfriend, and those hundreds of kids that know me as a friend and a role model, and for everyone who cares. Because they do care, and you are cared for too. Trust me.

I made the mistake, but you don't need to do the same in order to learn from it. Please, should you ever have any kind of suicidal thoughts, even briefly, tell somebody, and STAY.