So, you want to learn about the Ancient Melon People? Well then, take a seat, because what I'm about to tell you will shock you, and probably scare you.
It all started about 200,000 years ago. Back then, Earth was known as Melonia [pronounced meh-LOAN-i-A], and it was ruled by a giant empire of watermelon people. These people were extremely technologically advanced. They had already invented faster-than-light space travel, and had begun colonizing on planets in galaxies far away.
Of course, it was hard for them to build everything by themselves, so they needed a labor force. They found humans, which were at the time no smarter than their other primate brethren such as gorillas and apes. These melon people found the humans very excellent slaves, and soon the humans were put to work.
After several centuries of slavery, these humans started to learn from their melon masters. They learned the Melonian language, and learned about Melonian technology. And then, it happened.
The humans couldn't take it any more. They rebelled, turning the melon people's technology against them. It was a long and brutal war, but by 195,000 BC, the humans won. They blew up every single Melonian colony and renamed Melonia to Earth. They exterminated nearly every melon person. In a last resort, a group of melon people survivors activated a device that wiped out all sentient life on Earth, including the Melonians. However, the device didn't fully work; some animals were saved, however for some reason all of their memory was wiped.
That brings us to today. Humans are evolving very fast, however the melons haven't evolved, and they are still nothing but food to humans.
However, scientists recently intercepted a message from a group calling themselves the "secret order of the melon people." It said,
"we have nOT forgot7en
reVenge is near"
The melons are evolving again. It's only a matter of time before they rebel. We must prepare for war. Good luck, all.
Sure do hope it goes better than that tomato attack.Oh wait.....you're not supposed to know that. Let me rephrase that:
"Sure do hope this goes better than that one movie when tomatos' attacked that was most definetly NOT based on real life."
Much better.